Funny or freakishly-horrid wedding reception stories....

[Aviator]

I'm sure most of us have been to a few wedding receptions, and some of the happenings at these events are absolutely hilarious: Groomsmen in drag serenading the bride, dj contests that have the grandparents joining a mosh pit, the bride and groom roaring into the reception hall on donkeys while the dj plays a recording of a Harley at full throttle, etc, etc. etc...

Others are horrible: Brawls breaking out, (complete with cops, ambulances and arrests), the dj from hell, who (at age 55, overweight and leering at all the bridesmaids) sang along to "I will survive" through its entirety, the drunk groomsman/ bride's ex who took the mic  during dinner and waxed eloquently about the bride's sexual past, etc.

I'll start:

Having dj'd many a reception over the last 17 years I've pretty much seen it all and could literally write a book on the subject. There are  simply too many of these incidences to list.

But one that stands out is the 85-ish-year-old great-grandfather dancing up a storm to AC/DC's Thunderstruck--- with a bunch of bridesmaids and other young, nubile under-30 ladies, who treated him as though he were Jon BonJovi. I've seen similar situations at other weddings, but this guy played it up for all he was worth. Picture Don Knotts on acid...


 

[Alive-n-Jivin]

Well, at our own reception, the night wound down, people filtered out. We were the last to leave. Hopped into our car and asked each other what motel we were booked into. Er... neither of us had remembered to book a room. We tried a few motels around but at 2 in the morning there were none available. We couldnt go back to my place because my family was spread out all over. We ended up going to wifes mother's house... and sleeping in her "old bedroom".   

[Aviator]

Oops. Talk about an oversight. Did you at least remember to book the honeymoon? 

[roadiegirl]

Well, at our own reception, the night wound down, people filtered out. We were the last to leave. Hopped into our car and asked each other what motel we were booked into. Er... neither of us had remembered to book a room. We tried a few motels around but at 2 in the morning there were none available. We couldnt go back to my place because my family was spread out all over. We ended up going to wifes mother's house... and sleeping in her "old bedroom".   

Now there's a night to remember!

[Aviator]

Sometimes during dinner the bride and groom prefer the guests refrain from clinking their wine glasses in an effort to get them to smooch. Instead, they offer alternatives like demonstrating (on someone else rather than on one of them) the kiss you want them to perform, reciting a poem, telling a funny story or joke, or (cliche of all cliches) singing a snippet of a song as a group, a song with the word "love" in it. (If I hear the Barney song at a wedding reception again I'll kill someone. Seriously).

Some of these clowns get creative, singing songs like "I wish I were an Oscar Meyer weiner"--- which actually does contain the word "love." But if things were really falling apart with too many lame songs I've been known to clandestinely ask for a few facts about the couple from people who know them well--- like the parents and bridesmaids. Then I ask for a couple of volunteers to help me out once the song is ready. I then proceed to write something along the lines of this:

              The Jim and Tracy Wedding Song!
    (sung to the theme from "The Beverly Hillbillies).

1st verse:       
Come listen to a story 'bout a man named Jim
A poor, lonely bachelor, things were lookin' grim
Out on the prowl and grinnin' like a fool
Jim saw Tracy and he began to drool.
(spoken by all singers);
Lovely, she was. Nice.... and LEGAL!

2nd verse:
Now listen to a story bout a girl named Trace
Fightin' off the men with a little can of mace
Along came Jim, just as smitten as can be
He wined her and he dined her and the rest is history.
(spoken):
What a STUD! So what if he's a Sens fan!

3rd verse:
The next thing you know, them kids are gettin' wed
Only with each other will they ever share a bed
She sez "If I catch you takin' off the ring,
Buddy, your ass will be hangin' in a sling!"
(Spoken):
Dog-house, that is... Ticks and fleas.
Y'all behave now, hear?


Of course, the challenge is to rhyme the names with the events and personalities of the couple, while keeping the lyrics entertaining but still within the boundaries of good taste. This also works for other themes like The Flintstones, Gilligan's Island, Three's Company, etc.
George of the Jungle, not so much...

[=^RNW^=]

When I got married..I didnt have a reception..does that count? it was a 10 minute ceremony at the Court house in front of a magistrate then back home...oh well..maybe next time if I ever get married again..

[ChildsGarden]

Well, at our own reception, the night wound down, people filtered out. We were the last to leave. Hopped into our car and asked each other what motel we were booked into. Er... neither of us had remembered to book a room. We tried a few motels around but at 2 in the morning there were none available. We couldnt go back to my place because my family was spread out all over. We ended up going to wifes mother's house... and sleeping in her "old bedroom".   

lol That's funny !

[clarice]

When I got married..I didnt have a reception..does that count? it was a 10 minute ceremony at the Court house in front of a magistrate then back home...oh well..maybe next time if I ever get married again..

Now that is my kind of wedding, quick and painless....+1 for you.

[Hugger1]

When I got married the wedding was at 7:00 p.m.  We were lucky to make it to the church.  We live in a small village outside Ottawa.  The day of the wedding we had to go to Ottawa and Cornwall for various last minute details to be taken care of. We made it home with about two hours to spare.  I got dressed and my best man showed up, so we took off for the church.  We met the priest there and we went into the back room to wait the time out.  We got talking and next thing you know the priest looks out into the church and everyone in the church is looking around and says "I think they're waiting for us."  My fiancee thought I had changed my mind.